I love to write, it is like therapy to me sometimes but so is emotional eating or at least that is what for some time I have allowed myself to believe. When you feel bad, ain’t nothing like a tall extra cream and sugar iced coffee from Dunkins and a white cream filled chocolate donut…it’s the quick fix, similar to the cigarette, the drink, drugs and for some even reckless sexual encounters among other things.
But I gotta check myself.
With the recent passing of my great-grandmother I have become even more aware of how much I tend to turn to food for comfort. Even though I know I can always turn to God for the MOST comfort, there are those times when not even thinking about it I find myself self-soothing through something sweet and delicious. I love to eat and though there is nothing wrong with treating yourself to your favorite foods and sweets and treats, there has to be balance in one’s life. For a large part of last year I was focused on strengthening my mind and spirit and becoming closer and closer with God. It has been a really reflective time for me filled with many ups and downs but tons of GROWTH. I had to let go and let God on a lot of things and even though He has always shown me that He is there for me it was still a faith/trust walk that I am thankful for because I’m stronger and wiser today. So now that I am aware of the imbalance I am practicing the principle of replacement; that is as soon as I become aware of a behavior that I don’t like or that is unhealthy for me either mind-body or soul, I check myself…well God checks me – real rap. I am not perfect nor do I claim to be, I am human just like you BUT my desire is to become more and more like Him and if I am able, I want to get rid of anything that will try to hinder that but like I said I am a work in progress and I be checking me;)
Emotional eating is something that popped into my life around the time I was in an emotionally abusive relationship years ago. The overeating eventually led into cigarette smoking among other things but at one point I was smoking up to a pack and a half a day…it wasn’t until years later that I gave my life to Christ that I decided to try not smoking. It was HARD but eventually I gave it up and unaware, in came back the emotional eating. I have talked to many women on a #mindbodyandsoulfitnessjourney and awareness of self is key. Awareness, self-love and becoming real with yourself is the importance of balancing the mind-body and soul.
I didn’t realize I would write so much this morning especially before heading over to the cemetery to lay my great-grandmother to rest but this morning when I woke up in the silence of the room and the memories in my heart I decided to be even more thankful for life, health and strength. More thankful for loved ones. More responsible for my health. Instead of laying there for too long I decided to take all of that and workout on the treadmill today and push myself to sweat and replace what could be a negative response to mourning to a positive one… ultimately to”commit, endure & succeed.” This is the journey, real life stuff and day by day victories with the renewal of the mind through God’s grace.
I’m taking it day by day and I will get there…
30 minutes on the treadmill!